Awakening

I had to post this before it slipped my mind. By far the most important blog entry of my life to date. I read a book by austrailian journilist named John Pilger. The book was given to me by my father. I had read this before back in January, I remember feeling somewhat down and uncomfortable. At the time I feel I was not ready to take in such a harsh reality based on my own lifestyle.

However since January I have matured and decided to pick it up and read it again. My initial reaction was agrreance. Every word made sense. I felt disgusted at myself and every other citizen of the western population. Our ignorance towards our life. I felt almost physically sick when putting into the play the world around me what do I see that displays the truth spoken not just by this man but the others which I am yet to read about.

What was there. . Advertistment everywhere I look, strive for perfection, the pursuit of happiness, ego, media, consumers, retail, money, power, corruption.

I hear from people on a regular basis, dilemmas, unsolveable problems. Forever pursued by shit we don't need, television that is crammed down our throats on bollocks we would all be better of without.

I recall flicking through the tv to watch celebrity big brother. When reading the book "The new rulers of the world" I laughed and cried inside at my wn ignorance by watching such trash. I do however feel better of than most. I do live a somewhat free spirited life, yet I still at times feel driven by my ego. I won't get out of bed unless I feel I have a sole purpose that my ego feels must be achieved.

I say fuck it, tomorrow morning I will get out of bed whatever the weather take a walk into town and sit, look around and observe the world we live in today so I can really appreciate the words absorbed into my mind. I feel reawakended. Reading the words that almost brought me to tears has broke the chains I felt bound towards in life. Suddenly everything feels somewhat lighter, irrelevant. Nothing matters, because the rules do not apply. There is no balance, because there is no logic in any of it.

I will continue on my path with my mind opened ever so more. Blessed by the knowledge of this harsh reality. The illusion seems so apparent, viewed from both sides I can see simuntaneously. I feel no fear because the damage has long been done, the inevitable ways of our life I was born into. Why be afraid this world is no fairy tale now the vale has been lifted.

This is only the beginning of it all, the beginning of an awakening, the beginning of the end of my ego.