This day 3 years ago I moved to Weymouth. I can look at all the things I have achieved I have also finished college forever. So it is nice to see that 3 years ago I was embarking on an adventure on what today is now the next part of my life. Looking back to each year makes me realise nothing should be taken to seriously. Serious as in should not be treated as a permanent fixation of time . Everything changes and the hassle I may have put myself through has been forgotten I only remember the good. So may as well just focus on the good cause its all I will remember.
I look back to see I tried to hard only to think I should of just let it be it was fine that way :). It also snaps me out of my life last year which was when I was with Rebekah for 1 whole year. Looking back makes me realise that it was only a small part of my life things where happening way before that paticular year.
Anyway this place is my home at the minute I promise to take things easier and enjoy it the setting around me. Laugh lots and be amused at the things of life. A new stage in my life has began doors have opened :) :)
Tuesday, 21 June 2011
Saturday, 11 June 2011
I am listening
Recent events have inspired this blog entry. Overcomig the past for good and understanding my place in all of this. I mentioned before about my spirit guide that protects me and points me in the right directions. It tells me when to hold a second long and when to leave not one second to late. I am here to say after all ups and downs and mishaps I am listening.
I had a recent encounter with rebekah which I attempted to get her back only to see she does not love me anymore which I suppose I kinda already knew. Why do I still have feelings for her? Well I guess I was strongly influanced by the experiance and miss the fact I do not experiance that now though keeping other things in mind. I can only look back so much but will not help me in anyway achieve what I want. Something I set myself long before any of this so I could say its pointless to get wrapped up in something else.
This experiance has not been the most enjoyable though I feel is neccesarry for me to grow. As my dad once said it is better to have loved than to have not loved at all. I made a wish to experiance something beauitful and I did but however it had ran its course and we were both being side tracked from our own goals in life. To which has lead to this.
Knowing that as I go through life I will no doubt meet other woman but I have begin to consider something. Meeting woman should feel as natrual as anything in life like writing poetry or making the bed. Or for me like doing a kong vault. It has a sequence and follows a pattern. You know the way and how it is done you know what you must do and not do. It feels natrual. If any of those things do not feel natural then something is wrong.
I will meet other woman one day and the connection and chemistry no doubt will click natrually because I see myself as a likeminded guy who does not try to hard and is laid back. A scenario that took place tonight I will explain.
I was out with my friends and in the clubs I would think of meeting woman maybe getting to socialise. I bump into a group of girls some I know some I don't know. I tagged along and as the night progressed I could feel myself being surrounded by people who I do not normally converse with. Tention began to build and even close encounters which lead to me walking away. Fear of fighting I chose the option to walk for me I have no regrets. I was unharmed and I was nothing more than victim of wrong place wrong time and I was being challeneged by others.
After all that I went home sober as I do not drink and I stood by the sea. I just gave up on all this bullshit and decided that this has become silly now. I am pursuing something which has little or no awards for me. I have very little positive to gain from chasing these types of people. I have something good going for myself Parkour, Gymnastics, Writing, Personal Training. Those are the things I enjoy and also seeing friends but my friends I relate to that is my older friends.
So I am here to say that I am listening I am putting it all aside as I know it will only hold me back. Yes the future will come and all this will be a memory in which I will pick and choose what I remember. I love the life here and everything around it I don't accosiate with the people I came across today and I know to becareful.
I will stick by this phrase.
"If you cannot be without it, then you cannot be with it."
Moving on with another female for the sake of it will not do me justice I know that. As for Rebekah I just need to remind myself that the relationship was not perfect though I got to experiance alot. We were both fortunate and we got alot of positive from it. I have taken in what life skills come for the mistakes I will avoid making in the next relationship. Not that I made any major mistakes but I tripped up a few times. I know that I accept that and take it with a smile cause I did a good job of it all and so did she. We made each other happy but me well I just had to make a choice which contained more than I bargined for. The next one that comes along I will cherish every moment and love them very much.
But till then I have other things to be focused on and I will give it my best :) I will look back from time to time and smile as each yeah has been a blessing I am fourtune to have experianced it all. But I will avoid the ego desired goals that will only lead to downfall and trouble.
I'll stop going on now as I think I get the point. Life is all about learning, nothing stays the same so it is important that we make the most of now and embrace it Something I am determined to do :).
I had a recent encounter with rebekah which I attempted to get her back only to see she does not love me anymore which I suppose I kinda already knew. Why do I still have feelings for her? Well I guess I was strongly influanced by the experiance and miss the fact I do not experiance that now though keeping other things in mind. I can only look back so much but will not help me in anyway achieve what I want. Something I set myself long before any of this so I could say its pointless to get wrapped up in something else.
This experiance has not been the most enjoyable though I feel is neccesarry for me to grow. As my dad once said it is better to have loved than to have not loved at all. I made a wish to experiance something beauitful and I did but however it had ran its course and we were both being side tracked from our own goals in life. To which has lead to this.
Knowing that as I go through life I will no doubt meet other woman but I have begin to consider something. Meeting woman should feel as natrual as anything in life like writing poetry or making the bed. Or for me like doing a kong vault. It has a sequence and follows a pattern. You know the way and how it is done you know what you must do and not do. It feels natrual. If any of those things do not feel natural then something is wrong.
I will meet other woman one day and the connection and chemistry no doubt will click natrually because I see myself as a likeminded guy who does not try to hard and is laid back. A scenario that took place tonight I will explain.
I was out with my friends and in the clubs I would think of meeting woman maybe getting to socialise. I bump into a group of girls some I know some I don't know. I tagged along and as the night progressed I could feel myself being surrounded by people who I do not normally converse with. Tention began to build and even close encounters which lead to me walking away. Fear of fighting I chose the option to walk for me I have no regrets. I was unharmed and I was nothing more than victim of wrong place wrong time and I was being challeneged by others.
After all that I went home sober as I do not drink and I stood by the sea. I just gave up on all this bullshit and decided that this has become silly now. I am pursuing something which has little or no awards for me. I have very little positive to gain from chasing these types of people. I have something good going for myself Parkour, Gymnastics, Writing, Personal Training. Those are the things I enjoy and also seeing friends but my friends I relate to that is my older friends.
So I am here to say that I am listening I am putting it all aside as I know it will only hold me back. Yes the future will come and all this will be a memory in which I will pick and choose what I remember. I love the life here and everything around it I don't accosiate with the people I came across today and I know to becareful.
I will stick by this phrase.
"If you cannot be without it, then you cannot be with it."
Moving on with another female for the sake of it will not do me justice I know that. As for Rebekah I just need to remind myself that the relationship was not perfect though I got to experiance alot. We were both fortunate and we got alot of positive from it. I have taken in what life skills come for the mistakes I will avoid making in the next relationship. Not that I made any major mistakes but I tripped up a few times. I know that I accept that and take it with a smile cause I did a good job of it all and so did she. We made each other happy but me well I just had to make a choice which contained more than I bargined for. The next one that comes along I will cherish every moment and love them very much.
But till then I have other things to be focused on and I will give it my best :) I will look back from time to time and smile as each yeah has been a blessing I am fourtune to have experianced it all. But I will avoid the ego desired goals that will only lead to downfall and trouble.
I'll stop going on now as I think I get the point. Life is all about learning, nothing stays the same so it is important that we make the most of now and embrace it Something I am determined to do :).
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